树

在蓝色星球的一个村落上，有一棵树，唯一一棵树，被村民们奉养朝拜的树。

它是棵挺拔的老松树。
因为村民的灌溉与施肥，它又高又粗壮。
太阳每天照在它的绿叶上，让它得以进行光合作用，越长越茁壮。

有一天，它问太阳＂你爱我吗？＂
太阳坦然回答到＂我当然爱你，非常爱你阿＂

树很满足地、自豪地、告诉村民，
＂我是大地上，唯一一棵太阳爱着的树＂

它不知道，它不是大地上唯一的树。
它天真地以为，它是独一无二的。

日子渐渐过了，树死心塌地的爱着太阳。
为了更接近太阳，逼着自己越长越高，不在乎自己粗壮不粗壮，只要长得更高。

年复一年，树干越来越细，已经支撑不了大树那么多的叶子。大树为了接近太阳，把叶子都落下了。

过了好久好久，大树没有叶子制造食物，快枯死了。

一位从远方而来的长者问大树为什么要如此摧残自己，
大树说＂太阳全心全意只爱着我，我必须努力接近我的爱人，以更好地守护着它＂
长者说＂太阳爱着大地上所有的树，而你只是其中一棵微不足道的树阿...＂

大树听了以后非常难过，很后悔自己的一厢情愿断送了自己的性命。但已经太迟了。

大树死了。
它死去的枝干仍然扎根站稳在大地上，永远凝望着它深爱的太阳。

而此时太阳正回答蓝色星球另一角的一棵柳树说到＂我当然爱你阿，我非常爱你....＂
它永远不知道，这句话害死了松树......

With great ability comes great responsibility

没有Mood读书...
读了这么多年书，还有这么多年要读...
我好厌倦了。
真的，要追求梦想是要很大代价的。
毅力，恒心，我到底具备了吗？
还有10年以上我才能完成梦想，值得吗？
很想步入下一个里程碑了...
好多人都结婚了，有些更生了孩子〜
我那班笨蛋一定很快就嫁了啦〜一个两个感情都很稳定了〜
我大概是最迟嫁的吧？

读书的生涯我好腻了啊（；￣ェ￣）

为什么爸爸妈妈不把我的脑生残缺一点...
生一个不错的脑给我，害我觉得不好好用又对不起他们〜
哎〜
With great power comes great responsibility .
Spiderman是这样说的吗？
是Spider-Man 说的吗？(・・?)

成绩从小就不错，所以家人期望很大啊。
甚至自己对自己要求也很大...
是自负吗？

我就觉得with great ability comes great responsibility . 我既然比身边的人更适合当医生，我当然是去当医生咯。
如果我们这些有能力有兴趣当医生的人，都嫌弃course太长太难读，那国家医生短缺的问题都2030都达不到1：400的世界卫生组织的标准吧。

我觉得，只是对社会的一种责任。

你觉得来到这个世界上的意义是什么？

我觉得每个人来到这世界都有他的责任和角色。

我觉得我的责任，就是帮助其他来到这世界上的人健康地活着然后完成他们的责任，让他们健康的去扮演他们的角色。

我不知道这是不是上天把我派来这世界的原因，不知道这是不是上天安排给我的角色。但既然我有可能一辈子都不知道其中的答案，那不如为自己分析了去定位吧。

我知道自己有比别人强的能力，我不是最强的，但我肯定在中等以上吧。
既然上天给了我这份能力，我就要执行我的能力加以回报社会。

船到桥头自然直吧...

可能不久的将来，我就是人妻了〜

哈哈哈〜

想嫁想嫁！

该死的家伙，每天说要娶我，害我好想嫁〜囧rz

tight schedule

I've been busy preparing for mid-sem exam ...
And I'm not toooo tensed up for mid-sem , because ........ I scored a 4.0 cgpa for my semester 1 !!!
it's like a boost jap for my confident for a little ~
phew ~ didn't thought I would get such good result !
All hard work and hormonal imbalance paid off !
Still ... can't be too confident am I ?
I'm still working very hard for my sem 2!!!

Baby boy have been busy working ,and is having not so good time financial wise ...
pity boy ...

And he took three days off around valentine's day to spend our first valentine together !!!
it's happening so fast , we're together almost for a year !
feels like we just  fall in love yesterday ...

well...this is a really busy year !

gotta be a nice year !!! 

随笔

唉...好久没有用到华文这个语文，好生疏~XD

感觉好像用华文写博克比较能够表达情绪是吧？
太久没有用华文，文笔直接是退步阿！
想当年（其实前年罢了啦），我也是华文创作比赛的柔佛州代表叻~
我的散文还进了全国赛呢！！！（骄傲有没有）
哈哈哈~骄傲是要有本钱的咯~XD

今年步入2开头了，20岁了
这几年发生了好多好多事情，我的人生都已经可以被编辑成一本书了
这本书，应该属于爱情故事吧

我的近8年人生都以爱情为主
因为成绩很好，不用理学业太多 XD （再次骄傲！）

一直在寻找那份真爱，我想，经过那么多波折，幸福总算敲上我的门了

其实寻找真爱的旅途不容易
每一个有缘的人我都想尝试一起经历生活看看他会不会是我的MR RIGHT
可是一个接一个尝试了
别人眼里你的价值就低了
人家都觉得你一直在换男朋友
其实，我只不过想去认识自己在爱情里要的是什么
八年里，从玮龙，有光，铭轩，JESPER，到最后永麟，我没有后悔和任何一个人交往
虽然很爱抱怨他们有多不好，但是我没有后悔过

玮龙嘛...在两年恋情结束，被他甩掉之后，我学会 - 不能太约束男朋友，不然他会喘不过气

有光，在一起近3年，然后因为他对爱情的不衷，一次又一次的谎言，而让我选择结束这段感情。年龄差距整10岁。我没有很投入感情，所以没有太多感想。要说学会到什么，就是不要找年级太大的男朋友，也不要找别的男人代替前一个抛弃你的男人。要说起来，光只是一个避风港。和龙分手后就很随便进入这段感情，想忘记初恋，可是没有用啦...伤口是要时间来愈合的，不是涂药了就马上会好的

铭轩，是我暗恋很久的同学。第一个我自己喜欢上的男生，反而是我不敢去追求的爱情（可能因为之前都是被追求==）
暗恋他3年以后， 才知道他也一直在喜欢我。在一起不久就因为我不被他家人喜欢而分手了，我又被甩了。他真的很让我感受被爱的幸福。很专一的男人。
没有真的交往很深过，甚至亲都没有亲过（很遗憾XD）。但是从他身上，我学到最多道理。

真的爱一个人，是要她幸福，而不是很执着的约束她只能接受你给的幸福。

做人要现实一点，不要追求自己不可能得到的幸福，放手有时是对自己仁慈。

爱情，是很美丽的，但很多时候，像花朵盛开一样，美丽得很短暂。

他对我的疼爱，对我的保护，像他那副保护自己的盔甲一样。可是很可惜，最近我们连朋友的氛围都变得太窒息了。缘分真的太玩弄我们。

JESPER，交往短暂的半年时间，然后被他甩了。其实彼此都不是认真交往，分手却是因为我们都认真起来了。

因为知道不可能有结局，所以分手的吧。

他很疼爱我。在他身上，我学到最大的道理是，“人，要现实。太现实，却会在通往幸福的路上迷失”。很心疼他的现实，让他无法真的感受到爱情的温暖。希望现在这个女朋友能够改变他吧...

永麟，是我最美丽的意外收获。

很无厘头的遇见他，然后交往。

我知道，这个男人是我要共度一生的男人。

他给我的疼爱，已经超出一个境界...

我交往过，最好的男人。也不相信会有任何人比他更好了。

我很大女人，所以我很爱他把我作为生活的重心。

他给我的爱，像铺满玫瑰花蕊的床铺那样甜蜜温暖。

他让我相信世界上还是有好男人的。

两个人都在爱情里受过伤害，两个人都不相信爱情，却因为对方，而重新拾起对爱情的信心，甚至去相信真的有永远。这样的爱情，真的很美很美！

他用生命保护我，给我所有最好的幸福，不惜一切换取我的笑容。

他宁愿牺牲自己也不让我受一点委屈。

像座保护我的保垒。像我的大气层，给我所需要的空气，阳光。

像天使一样，守护我。

我很爱他。很想嫁给他。因为我相信，我是他的最爱，也知道，他是我爱情的结局，我的HAPPILY EVER AFTER 。

怎么会有这种人

是不想发表什么负面博客的

但是有想法要收着真的很辛苦

怎么会有人那么不要脸,背着自己的男朋友被别人搞大肚子,

结果骗男朋友说孩子是他的...

还要他出钱让你打掉...

钱到手问题解决了就甩掉男朋友!

怎么会有人脸皮厚成这样!

才15岁的女生,交过十多个男朋友?!

我15岁才交第二个耶...

真的,男朋友对你那么好,你却在外面乱来,还欺骗自己的男朋友!

你要的不过是他的钱!

他一失业你就分手,也是很可以咯~

现实到...................................

其实看得出啦，你交男朋友是为了什么。

你交的男朋友都比你大那么多的，不是为了钱是什么？

很替他不值

为什么被你这种女人玷污

还害他被全世界误会，指责...

唉~好像不是很应该这样批评。

但是不说出来真不舒服~

然后为了让那个不会英文的女生明白内容，还要特地写华文博克~

哈哈哈~

Mickey sweater / starbucks

ok .. so ... I FINALLY FOUND THE MICKEY SWEATER THAT I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR SO LONG !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 i've beeb looking for mickey sweater for my Hong Kong disneyland trip

when i finally gave up searching

i some how saw it in a shop in KSL

RM 35 ? i think (bcos James paid , i didn't bother bout the price XD)

but i'm sure it's not more than RM50!

that's why i let him bought it for me 

tadaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

and theres a bigggggggggg pocket which is soooooooooooooooo convenient !!!!!!!

loving how the big sweater made me look tiny ! ILLUSION ~~~~~~~~~~~ XD

both eyes opened !!! because i had double eye lid sticker on . and my eyes are nearly equal sized <3

so today i'm tooooo bored and decided to drive down to setia tropika Starbucks for some pastry and coffee ~

while reading my "Torment"

they have the best Chic'O Cheese evaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!!!

so pricey >< RM 7.xx not included GST !!!

arghhhhhhhh why good food so expensive ?!

i ordered the new beverage 'Soy Green tea Frappucino'  , rate it ... 6/10 .
toffee nut latte is always the best !

wearing these shoes ...
no heels !!!!!!!!!!!1

loving my make up for the day ...
i lost my eyebrow pencil so ... my brows are weird XD

My lovely boyfriend

we bought the shirts separately . it took us a few month to get the girl's one  (mine)
BEARD SHIRT !!!
the beard was like so famous
everyone has the beard shirt , rings , ear rings , handphone cover .......

My lovely boyfriend ,

He's introvert .

He's quiet .

He's funny .

He's thoughtful .

He's responsible .

He's caring .

He's generous .

He's my protective capsule .

He sacrifice everything for me .

He rather skip meals just to bring me to overseas for vacation.

He rather work more than 48 hours one shot every time on his OT , just to get me nice valentine's day gift .

He rather suffer hunger , just to save those money to bring me for nice cuisine .

He do all these stuff even though i never demand , and i will never demand .

He left all his friends because they bullied me .

I always ask him , "do you love me the most in the whole universe ?"

He will only reply me "umm-hmm"

and i will tear up crying and asking"you don't love me the most right ? ..."

and he will cry seeing me cry ...

and answer me"of course i love you the most , but i don't want to SAY it , i want to SHOW it ! i want you to FEEL it for yourself ... "

He's not good with sweet talk .

He's not all that romantic.

but , he is definitely the best bf in the whole wide world .

no matter how tired he is after long day of work , he will stay up till morning for me when i'm having insomnia .so that he will always be there by the phone in case i can't sleep and calls him , so he can chat with me till i fall asleep ...

he is so lovable ...

my pictures are alllllll over his phone , the cover , apps profile pics , screen savers ...

his room is fillllllllled with my pictures too.

even his conversation with colleagues and friends are all about me .

i can feel that i'm the major part of his life , i've never felt like this in the past relationships...

he is my lovely bf .

my baby .

Fun food

baby boy loves all junk foods .

and yesterday we went KSL for dating , and he is attracted to a new store selling"Fried rice bun" ...

i personally dislike food like this .

i hate waffle ... takoyaki ... any street food basically ...

because they are kinda pricey for the small amount and unhealthy ...

but when James wanna eat something , no one can stop him .

He Loves Food

there he goes carrying all my shopping bags and my bag ...
he does that everytime .
he never let me carry ANYTHING !!!

patiently waiting for the foooooooooooood

it was nice but very pricey in my opinion ,

the set = 1 beverage + 1 small rice bun (size of palm) = RM 9.90

it's like two plate of chicken rice leh !!!!

this is the cute bastard that costs us RM9.90

and then at night we went to study for my physics test 

me studying, well actually faking a study pose and camwhore it down ...
while James watching Yugi-Oh on his phone ... 

i was very frustrated because my physics lecturer is definitely incapable of teaching that subject .

her knowledge on the subject is so shallow

even easy questions that we can answer easily was a problem for her to solve

she couldn't solve simple questions

she refused to listen to us (who knows the particular stuffs much better than her)

she refused to learn before she teaches us

she goes like "A + B = C"

and we will prove that the actual equation is " A-B = C"

and she will be like , "yes , yours is correct"

and we will be like "but it's different from yours"

and she will be like " ya la ! same lah !"

when it is totally different things

when we ask how she get that equation , she will look at the paper she copied from , and write the same thing down , which is WRONG .

and she don't gives a fuck

if we ever dare to ask again , she shouts ...

she gives question for us to solve , and she go to the back of the class sleeping , and SNORES 

then , she copy the answer from answer script in her hand , 

if we have confusion , she copy down the working , without explaining .

this is so fucked up.

but we heard that we're getting new lecturers ... so ... let's hope that we WILL get a better lecturer ...

haiz ......

what's the best way , no one knows .

meditate , hypnotize
anything to take it from my mind , but it won't go .

no matter how hard i try , some things are just too hard to let go .

it is exhausting ...

having something stuck in your mind every now and then 

no matter how hard you force yourself to get over it 

it just doesn't seem to fade even a little

sometimes i wish i can suffer a repression or something ...

no matter how hard you suppress the thoughts in your conscious mind , they just seem to hide into the subconscious proportion and come crawling out messing with your mind at time intervals.

i'm a sentimental person i would say ,

i hold on to things that i cherish too hard , 

often having a hard time to let it go when it's no longer my possession ...

some people , some past , some things 

definitely molded me into a better person .

and by the perception of people in defining "better person" , it simply means that particular individual became better in hiding the negative feelings by faking a smile .

I am much happier lately .

Nourished in James' love .

But some negative elements are still haunting me ... some scars just won't heal ...

who would i be if James didn't walked into my life ?

what would i have became if he didn't walk me through those tough time ?

I love him , I do .

I would marry him if fate is kind enough to make him mine legally .

because i can ...

because we can ...